Dead Calm
by S J Armstrong 88
Summary: Sookie honours her promise as Holly's Maid of Honour, on her way she has to organise squabbling bridesmaids, deal with heightened emotions oh and fit her Viking Vampire for a tux of his own, set in the D.A.L.I sookieverse. Rated T for now
1. Chapter 1

_(Hey just a quick author's note: if you read this before "Dead and Loving it" there might be a couple characters or references you won't get, but you should be able to follow this one without a problem)._

_I really didn't like that certain characters were killed off in Dead and Gone, so I'm ignoring that book and writing as though it never happened. X (I won't say who I don't wanna spoil it)._

_**Disclaimer**__: Also I do not own the Southern Vampire Mysteries nor any of the characters so don't sue! However Harmony and Rachel are my characters. Thanks for taking the time to read this. _

Rejuvenation, that was my word of the day from my calendar, for once a good omen.

"Oh you can't be serious, Holly this is terrible!" Tara began.

Holly chuckled and said "I was joking, Tara do you really believe I would opt for tangerine frills on all my bridesmaid dresses?" I nearly choked on my coke, the look on Tara's face was priceless. I had wondered whether Holly would change her mind about my being head bridesmaid, I mean there must surely be better options, but to my surprise and mild pride, she had kept to her decision.

We were sat in a booth at Harmony's discussing plans for Holly's wedding, it was a couple of weeks away but there was still a lot to organise.

"So you have finalised the guest list?" Tara asked.

"Yeah, and I've talked to Hoyt and we have both agreed that the wedding is going to take place after dark" she replied and I smiled. "We can't have the Maid of honour dateless" Holly winked at me.

"We've just gotta make sure that it's not the full moon" I laughed.

"Yeah it wouldn't do to have one of the groomsmen wearing a fur coat and howling to the wedding march". I was glad about Hoyt's choice of groomsmen. Holly added "Even if Sam _does _make a very cute collie".

"That's true but trust me I don't know how comfortable the guests would be if Jason were in his other form".

"Hey does Eric have a tux?" Tara asked.

"Oh yeah and he looks amazing in it, but I don't know he's kinda proud about his best clothes, he might want a new one" Tara's face lit up at that, Eric was known for buying suit's in more than one colour in case he changed his mind, which meant good business for the store that had him as a customer. I smiled and looked at my old friend as she sipped on her orange juice. "I'll ask him about it when I get home".

It had been a good couple of months since Eric and I had started officially dating and so far so great. He had been spending more time at my place, and I in turn had stayed over at his. Tonight he would have woken up in the new hidy hole under my bed. I should have been home half an hour ago, but I'd left him a note telling him I was fulfilling my bridesmaid duties and that there was a new gallon bottle of TrueBlood in the fridge. I wished I was with him, he was always fun when he'd just risen.

"I'm glad I wasn't asked to be a bridesmaid" Tara announced suddenly, Holly looked a little confused, and I could tell from her mind that she was wondering if Tara was put out at not being asked, even though the two of them hadn't ever been what you'd call gal pal's.

"Why's that?" Holly asked tentatively. Tara smiled nervously.

"I'd have to keep altering my dress, I'm pregnant"

"That's fantastic" Holly grinned, and I added my own congratulations, I had already suspected, when Tara ordered the orange juice, but out of respect for my friend I had stayed firmly in my own head.

The three of us shared in a group hug and clinked our glasses together, enjoying a girly moment, it's a shame Amelia hadn't been here, but she and Tray were enjoying some much needed alone time.

TBC

_(sorry it's short but later chapters will be much longer. I wanted to get the first chapter up to spur me on, should have the next chapter up tomorrow. Thanks for reading sorry it's kind of a teaser)._


	2. Chapter 2

_**Disclaimer**__: Sadly I do not own the rights to Charlaine Harris's world, (I wish, and then I'd have saved certain characters and bumped off Bill. Sorry Bill fans)._

8 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 8

As I rounded the corner on to Hummingbird lane, I smiled. Tonight was the first night off I'd had in ages. Now normally I would be happy to work a few extra shifts, but I had taken on more than my fair share. Sam is a great boss, but since the great Two-Natured revelation, we had lost one waitress, and gained more curious customers. Pam interestingly had filled in on occasion, but I'm pretty sure she only wanted to be near Sam and as a side benefit, she enjoyed scaring the more leery customers. On one of the busiest evenings we'd had for a while I had to grit my teeth and call Tanya in to beg her to take a shift, when I was greeted with surprising news, she and Calvin were going to have a kid. I wondered absently what their child would be, fox or panther, maybe a weird hybrid, a Paxer or a Fother, possibly even a Fanxer? I suddenly had images of a beautiful lithe Panther body with a bushy red tail poking out of its butt. At any rate with Two-Natured fertility so low Tanya was taking all precautions, so bars with beer fumes and the occasional rough customer were out of the question. My hard work was worth it though, because now I had a whole three days off.

I could feel myself relax as I drove up the neat drive, towards Eric and hopefully a slice of Pie. I hung up my coat and grinned from ear to ear as I saw him pulling something out of the oven, a domesticated Vampire, every girl should have one. He turned and winked at me. As we had grown closer we had naturally become more attuned to one another, and on odd occasions I was sure he was reading my mind.

"Hello Lover" he purred. "Good night with the girls?" He asked as he placed the pie dish on the table, he placed a kiss on the top of my head as he cut the pie. I do love a man who can multi-task. I looked him up and down he was in his dark jeans and Fangtasia T-shirt. His hair in a long braid, Eric also had on a Kiss the Cook apron that was a gift from Amelia.

"Sure was, we talked guys, weddings and babies" I smirked as Eric tilted his head to the size resembling an oversized puppy.

"Holly" he paused for a second as he searched for the right idiom "knocked up already?"

"Naw" I chuckled, "Tara" I glanced around.

"Amelia and Tray are out, they left a note. Are you to be in charge of the baby party as well?" He asked one eyebrow raised. Eric served me a slice and handed me the plated up pie with theatrical aplomb. It was delicious and it reminded me of our first proper date.

"Sleep well?" I asked between bites.

"Like the dead" he answered dead pan (sorry bad puns are contagious, like chicken pox but more fun). "I did receive a call from Victor Madden though"

"What here?" I asked, worried for a moment, if Victor knew Eric was here then that could only mean one of two things. One Eric was being watched more closely than anticipated. Two there was a spy at Fangtasia, only his underlings there would know where he would be tonight.

"No it was on my cell, but that doesn't rule out him watching me" Eric's brows drew together momentarily as though he were trying to solve a math problem that didn't add up.

"You still think he wants' rid of you?" It was no secret that Eric had survived the (very) hostile takeover by the skin of his teeth. I had even saved the new boss, which didn't go down too well with Victor, who (if the rumour mill was accurate) had been eyeing Eric's area with great interest. He had even been eyeing me according to Pam. That's a lot of motivation to get rid of Eric.

"Possibly, but on this occasion he was congratulating me on the unique extension to my business" when I looked confused he clarified "The baked goods we have begun selling at Fangtasia" I smiled to myself, I had joked that he should sell his pie's because they were so good, and Eric had run with the idea. Pam told me they now had doubled their customers since the idea's inception (inception was my word of the day last week).

I finished my pie and left the plate in the sink to soak. Eric picked me up and slung me over his shoulder and carried me to the bedroom. Normally I'd protest but my feet were killing me and I was always glad to be in Eric's arms, although preferable right side up.

He threw me onto the bed and ran his tongue along my neck, which was Mmmn distracting. He kissed me and his kiss was gentle and sweet. Knowing Eric it meant he wanted to talk, or wanted _me _to talk.

"My Sookie pie, tell me of your day, and your most interesting evening" he nuzzled my neck with his nose inhaling my scent deeply. I lay on my side so we were facing each other, he pulled me close to him so I could rest my head on his well defined chest. He smelled good, like herbal essence.

"You're been stealing my shampoo again haven't you?" I asked swatting him in the chest to no effect.

"Only because it reminds me of you" he answered simply, not a hint of remorse in his deep voice. He was staring at me with those big baby blues and I couldn't help but inch closer to him. He smiled knowing I wasn't really mad. I wondered if he had thought of a response in advance.

"Work was quiet for once, but it was only lunchtime, and the evening was fairly short, Holly wanted to get back to her son and Hoyt and Tara had to get back to JB" I said, stifling a yawn.

"And you wanted to get back to me" Eric added.

"And I wanted to get back to you" I agreed looking up at my handsome Viking, who knew no modesty.

"So how much of this gathering was wedding planning and how much was gossip" my lover wondered.

"Oh about thirty percent wedding and seventy percent gossip" I confessed. Eric chuckled and I felt better about everything.

"You seem tired Sookie" he noted as he moved a strand of hair from my face, the cool touch of his long fingers felt wonderful on my warm cheeks.

"Just one of those days, you know" I said slowly enjoying the soft fabric of the duvet on my aching feet.

"Not really lover, I don't _do _day all that well, but I have had wearing nights"

"Oh I'll bet" I giggled. I began squirming as he tickled me. He scooped me up Rhett and Scarlet style that way I like, and he carried me to the bathroom.

He sat me on the edge of the sink and began to draw me a bath. He added the perfect bath essences that complimented one another, I hadn't seen them before and I wondered where he had got them. He noticed where I was looking and winked.

"I have been around a while, and at one time it was entirely fashionable to enjoy long relaxing baths instead of showers". He wriggled his eyebrows suggestively as he added "I like to take my time".

He certainly enjoyed taking his time divesting me of my clothes. I moved to kiss him, which he allowed but only briefly, he placed a finger on my lips, and gently lifted me into the tub.

Bliss. There wasn't another word for it. "There's room for two" I whispered and looked up at him fixing him with my best come hither stare. He held his finger to his lips and whispered "enjoy, I shall be back in a moment" I settled down to enjoy my own special oasis.

He returned quickly with a pad and pen, and best of all he was butt naked. Yum. He slid in across from me carefully, barely rippling the surface of the water.

"I understand the nudity, but the pad and paper. You don't have a secret secretary fantasy do you?" I teased.

"Lover you are head bridesmaid, which I am informed is a great honour, and since your meeting was mostly gossip, I thought _I _would lend a hand, toss ideas about, brainstorm"

"Have you been watching _The Apprentice _again?" I asked.

"Yes, but that is not the point, I know you want to do well, so I will do what I can to make things easier on you."

"Well good, because I have no idea where to start. I'm not exactly miss normal, so this is the first time I have ever been Maid of honour."

"I rented a film about it" Eric said taking me by surprise.

"There's a film about being a Maid of Honour?"

"Well it's called Made of Honour" Eric began "I think it is meant to be a woman's comedy, but surely there are ideas you can pilfer"

"Oh with Doctor Dreamy" I laughed, as Eric shot me a look. "And I think the term you are looking for is _chick flick" _Eric seemed to mull the term over as I enjoyed the warmth of the water. I loved bath time with Eric, especially since it meant afterwards he'd be warm, and for a while at least would feel human temperature.

"He's not as hot as you" I added. Not that I needed to appease his massive ego, which was nearly as big as his... I was brought out of my thoughts by Eric's sudden bellow.

"Clothes!"

"Okay, not so necessary right now baby" I said, not trying to conceal my confusion.

"No I mean has everyone been fitted with their clothes for the wedding"

"Well Tara is in charge of kitting everyone out. Oh do you wanna wear your tux or a new one, Tara was wondering if you needed one"

"I will buy a couple, I don't know why but when I'm around you my clothes get ruined, so I had better have a spare". He smirked but he had a point.

"Well I guess there's the shower?"

"Now I am confused, we are in the bath Sookie dearest"

"No a wedding shower, it's like a party for the bride"

"So what's the point of a bachelorette party?" He asked confused.

"That's a kind of a wild last night of freedom tradition; apparently, I've only ever been to Arlene's"

"Which one?" Eric asked, his tongue sticking out of his mouth.

"The last two" I laughed. "And a wedding shower is more for the friends of the bride who aren't part of the wedding and older women who wouldn't want to go to a strip club".

"Wait you have to organise the stripper?"

"Well yeah"

"So you have to see many other men naked, and judge who is the best looking to give the females present the best possible experience".

"Before you suggest it no, you can't be the stripper. I know you are the best looking man on the planet, but you are mine and you're not flashing my friends."

"For your eyes only, and while I am perfectly certain that you will have no interest in another man, it does not mean said man would not be interested in you". In his mind his logic was sound.

"Ok I have an idea" I said and told Eric of my stripper suggestion. "Do you think that I should get a female stripper too? Pam's coming and I think one or two of Holly's former coven members are gay".

"It might be a thoughtful idea, maybe ask the lesbians and Pam if they would enjoy a stripper and plan accordingly" Eric answered while massaging my sore feet. What a guy. "Who is this Hoyt having as his best man?"

"Amazingly he's picked my brother" I replied. I did wonder why when Hoyt and he weren't as close as they used to be, but then they had been best friends for a lot of years.

"That is a good sign is it not?" Eric asked. "Will you be all right coping with Jason?"

"Yeah, I'll be glad to see him actually. You know Crystal is pregnant again"

"The women in this town are incredibly fertile" Eric noted as he loaded his hands with soap after putting the note pad down.

"I had noticed" I said dryly, at this rate all of my human and two-natured friends would have kids. Calvin Norris had once told me that he thought I would have made a good breeder, dating a Vampire I would never get to find out if that was true, but as my Viking made sure I was exceptionally clean in the tub, I didn't really care....

TBC

8 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 8

_(Thanks for the reviews it's appreciated, I think I'm going to be uploading a short quick story that focuses on what Amelia and Tray were up to when they had their alone time. (Not in that way... well maybe)It's called "Dead wolf walking" and will be set during/after chapter 2 of this story) _

**Still to come: **Makeovers, a bachelorette party, war wear and some more Sookie Eric fun.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

*yikes has it been a year since I last updated, gosh time flies when you're not paying attention*

You're supposed to welcome advice from friends and family right? That's what they're there for, thing is when you're trying to keep a track of organising a wedding for your friend, then you have to learn to say, thanks but no thanks. I'd already had eight separate customers remind me that I had to throw a shower, another six told me that I had to get the best present, and the only truly helpful thing anyone had said to me was "I'll babysit Holly's kid during the bachelorette party if you like?" that was from Sam, he really was one in a million.

"Thanks" I replied and kissed his cheek. The wage might be minimum and my feet might kill me by the end of the night but with a boss like Sam, my job was pretty great. "So you haven't mentioned her in a while, how's things with Pam?" I asked grinning at Sam (his short lived fling with a shifter named Rachel had ended when her visa ran out, some things even supernaturals can't get around)

"It's well,… it's different, she's so…"

"Pam" I supplied helpfully.

"Yes, she's very Pam, and she's rude, and beautiful, and I have no idea where I stand with her". He said looking happy and confused all at once. I took a peek in his mind to see that he genuinely cared for Pam but that he couldn't imagine a future without kids. I smiled sadly, knowing that even with another Supe having kids would be tough for Sam.

"Maybe you should talk to her, she could just be like you, wanting to see where it goes, I'm sure she's been around long enough to know what the average expiration date is for a vamp, and a shifter"

"Do you ever think about that?" Sam asked, I knew he regretted it as soon as he'd said it, but some things can't be taken back, and I sighed thoughtfully. I perched on one of the bar stools and Sam joined me on the one beside it. The lunch crowd was slow and no one looked ready for a refill just yet.

"Yeah I've thought about it, but me and Eric are so new, we have a few years before we have to think about that, at least till I'm in my thirties" I grinned, I thought that was when Eric had been turned.

"You've never thought about…being like him" he asked in a voice so low I barely heard it.

"I.. don't think I'd make a bad vampire exactly, you know even Pam said I had potential" I shot Sam a sideways glance wondering what he thought about his girlfriend plotting to turn one of his bar staff.

"You know Pam, she probably just wants to poach you for Fantasia" I grinned then put on her accent "Sam you know if you raised your prices and put on a shifter show, you could seriously increase your profit margins" He finished his voice cracking as he tried to maintain her perfectly level tone. I burst out laughing, that _did _sound like something Pam would say.

"Maybe she has a point, I mean folks round here thought it was pretty interesting that you could turn into a collie, maybe once a week you could have a game of pick the animal, and you could shift into what ever animal you pick out of the hat, but go behind a curtain or something, you know in case anyone wants to bring their kids, it could be like a David Copperfield show" I finished enjoying the pained look on Sam's face, clearly he was picturing it all too.

"You know one of Copperfield's beautiful assistants is actually a shifter"

"Huh" I said "Must be how he pulls off the disappearing elephant trick"

"Yup" Sam replied "That's one of the draw back's of being a supernatural, nothing much surprises you anymore".

I smiled and got back to work. I only had a couple of hours before I had to meet the girl's for their fittings.

I left the bar as it was drawing dark, Pam would be up soon and I knew I'd have hell to pay if I kept her waiting. Tara had kept the store open late for us.

As I drew up to the parking lot I noticed that Hoyt was already there dropping Holly off her son was sleeping in the back. The two of them were enjoying a tender moment, Hoyt stroked the side of her face with his thumb, and he bent down to kiss her gently, not wanting to intrude, I slipped back into the tree lined area by the large stone fence. I knew immediately that I wasn't alone…no brainwaves I could tell, but somehow it didn't feel like Pam, I glanced around carefully.

"Hey there Miss Sookie" Bubba cried happily. He picked me up in a big old bear hug swinging me around. Holly and Hoyt broke away from one another, Holly laughed when she saw my predicament, her eyes going wide when she saw the King hugging me like his own personal ragdoll.

"Isn't that El-" she began before I cut across.

"Bubba, yep this is Eric's friend Bubba"

Pam emerged from the shadows moments later. "Bubba" she began annoyance permeating her usually calm exterior. "What have we said about running off"

"I'm sorry miss Pam" he said, childlike and contrite in his apology "I just knew I could smell miss Sookie and I wondered why she was hiding in the dark."

"A good question" Pam replied giving me a level look.

"I just like to smell the tree's some time that's all" I responded smiling my uncomfortable smile.

Tara emerged from the front door and called "Are you guys gonna stand out there till the rapture, or are you gonna come in already?

Tara had laid on the works, there were pitchers of iced tea and lemonade, a small pitcher of true blood as a concession to Pam, and each changing room had a clothing bag hung up inside along with a show box. My cubicle I noticed had a few extra bags, as did Holly's.

"Are you expecting us to change half way through the reception?" I asked looking quizzically at the garment bags.

"Naw, those other bags are Suits for Holly's son, and Hoyt and Eric" she explained.

Pam had nipped in and out of the changing room so fast we jumped when she emerged fully dressed in her bridesmaids outfit, it was a midnight blue, that I knew instinctively would suit all of us. Each had been tailored to suit our shape, mine complemented my curves perfectly and made me look good without showing too much cleavage.

I asked Tara what made her pick the colour, but she said it was all down to Holly.

Holly's voice came from the cubicle a little muffled as she tried to be careful with her dress. "Actually the colour and different cuts were Eric's idea"

I smiled "Ah he said he'd helped, I thought he'd been joking" I answered.

We all stood with out mouths open as Holly emerged from the changing room, she looked like a fairy princess, (and being related to a few that was saying something) serene and angelic, not a bit like her former Goth incarnation.

We were lucky that the dresses fitted perfectly, so Tara didn't have to make any alterations. After a quick change we all had a drink and got to talking as we perused Tara's stock.

"Pam" I said as I help a grew wool skirt up to myself

"No no no" she said frowning at my selection, she picked up a oriental print dress in a sky blue/turquoise "much better"

"ok, not what I was going to ask"

"Oh, well I'm still right" she said mildly huffily.

"Did you get Rachel deported?" That question had taken her by surprise, which is, I think, the reason she didn't lie.

"It was for his own good, she wouldn't have made him happy"

"The gorgeous red head was bad for him" I asked baffled by her logic.

"Besides" she added airily "he is mine" Vampires and their love of possessive pronouns I'd never understand it, and I said as much.

"Oh come Sookie dear, if someone tried to take Eric from you, we both know you'd find your inner Vampire and deal with them accordingly" I laughed at that.

"Oh Miss Sookie" Bubba jumped in happily, and I nearly jumped out of my skin, I'd forgotten he was there, tucked away in a corner looking at shoes, singing rather aptly about "blue suede shoes" "oh I do hope you become a Vampire too" he said happily, "then you and Mister Eric can get married Vampire style, and I can sing for you"

"Oh Bubba that's very sweet" I chuckled to myself "but I think that's a long way off somehow"

"I don't know, Mister Eric-" Pam cut him off mid burst.

"Thinks of human life as very short Bubba, but he won't rush Sookie"

"No Miss Pam" Bubba nodded in what I took to be comprehending gesture.

"I could sing at your wedding" Bubby cried at Holly, who looked entirely startled. I knew she was very flattered that such a famous Vampire wanted to perform for her.

"Wouldn't you mind?" she asked still visibly shocked.

"Oh no I love weddings, I wish I could remember my own properly" there was a touch of wistful sadness about him as he glances down at the ring on his left hand. He began the hum "only you" under his breath, and Pam eyeing him nervously suggested "Home time Bubba, I'm sure these ladies all want to get back to their respective partners"

"Are you going to see the shifter?"

"Possibly" she answered warily.

"Can he turn into a cat? I like cats" Bubba said absently. Pam glowered at him, but it was like water off a duck's back. Sam could indeed turn into a cat, a very big cat, (during the brief were war, he had become a Lion to protect me) and the thought of Bubba trying to snack on him gave my chills.

I wondered what Bubba had been trying to say before Pam cut him off earlier. I walked through my back door to be greeted by the glorious smell of chocolate chip cookies.

There was a note attatched to the cardboard container, "Lover, I will stay at my Ruston nest tonight, I have work that must be addressed, but here is a token of my affection, sadly I know it will not satisfy you in the way you prefer, and should you wish for a more personal display call me at Fangtasia, yours E"

I laughed, not one for subtlety tonight I noticed, the cookies, were all decidedly true to life replica's of Mister Happy. Yum. I wondered if they were going to be new editions to the Fangtasia bakery collection. Students with the munchies would certainly enjoy them.

I had my shower and got into bed, turned out the light and called my horny Viking, bringing a cookie with me. It was a very satisfying call indeed.

_(again sorry it took so long to get on with a new chapter, the next chapter is all about the things that can and do go wrong.) thanks again to everyone who has given me feedback it is greatly appreciated. x_


	4. Chapter 4

(Disclaimer: I don't own Charlaine Harris's characters nor do I own the rights to them, don't sue thanks)

Chapter 4

I awoke to a beautiful sunny day, not that Bon temps usually gets much in the way of diverse weather, not at this time of the year. Still it was always nice to feel the sun on my skin. I put on my bikini and headed for the garden, the weeds had begun their attack on my flowerbed's, or should I say Gran's flower beds, I would always think of the garden as hers. As I felt the suns rays sooth all the tension from my body I thought about what Bubba had said the night before. Me, a Vampire, it didn't seem likely, without a tan I didn't feel like myself, but I sure wouldn't miss cramps, or periods. Did female Vampires still have periods? I doubted it, after all why would dead women need them it's not like they could have kids. That was another thing, I knew from the off that kid's with Eric would be an impossibility, but still, it was something I thought I'd have eventually. Adoption was an option, but the senate were still debating the vampire's right to adopt, given that they don't always remember their own strength and could forget you're not meant to munch on your young. Vampires are made for hunting not nurturing, but I knew Eric was raised in a time where children were cherished. I shook myself out of my ponderings, way too early to think about kids, hell we didn't even live together.

I felt a prickle on the back on my neck, the air had stilled and the birdsong had stopped. "Hello" I called, mentally smacking myself, how many times had I seen what happened to stupid girls who called hello instead of grabbing a weapon and running for safety. The growl was low, I grabbed the spade and stood swinging it up like a baseball bat as I went, I was certainly surprised by what I saw.

A Dingo, an honest to God, Sheppard of Judea Dingo! In Bon Temps, it tilted it's head to one side, ears sharp and alert, long tongue lolling out it's sandy fur glistening in the sunlight. It let out another low growl, but I got the distinct impression it wasn't growling at me, it trotted up to me head low and sniffed, then brushed up against my legs, pushing me back, towards the house, it continued to growl, but as far as I could tell it was growling at the large Black Crow sitting in one of the tree's that lined my driveway. I couldn't blame the Dingo that bird was creepy, as I looked from one creature to the other, I got the distinct impression that I should get the hell away from both of them.

I locked the door behind me panting hard, heart in my chest, I hadn't run to the house but edged slowly, I'd seen documentaries about Dingo's and knew what they were capable of, they were closer to wolves than dogs. I just wondered how in the hell an Australian wild dog had got to my yard.

I perched on the edge of my bed and grabbed my phone, maybe I should call Alcide, find out if they had a Dingo in the area. Just as I was about to dial, the phone rang in my hand, and I jumped about a foot off my bed.

"Sookie Stackhouse speaking" I said, Gran had always taught me to answer the phone politely, and stating who you are often got rid of wrong numbers and time wasters.

"Miss Stackhouse, this is Gerard, Beaumont, I'm the caterer you requested for the Fortenberry wedding?"

"Mister Beaumont, it was good of you to call yourself-" I began

"The thing is" he cut me off "I'm afraid we can't hand the account anymore"

"Oh, may I ask why that is?" I answered swallowing my temper, I had a pretty good idea but I didn't want to rile him just in case.

"It has come to the attention of some of our staff, that there will be… Vampires in attendance, some of our staff have had negative experiences in the past, and they are refusing to work on the night of the wedding"

"I see, well I'm sure the Vampires they dealt with are nothing like my boyfriend" I could feel his embarrassment through the phone line, he hadn't wanted to cancel this account I could tell, it was a recession, and everyone needed all the work they could get. Sadly not everyone was as accepting as I was.

"No possibly not… we will give you a full refund on your deposit of course"

"Thank you I appreciate that, and I hope that in future you'll make sure your staff are a little more open minded" I said as sweetly as I could manage, when inside I was fuming.

Great, disaster 1: Find new caterer.

Disaster 2 it turned out had similar origins, people were scared of what having Vampires in their ballroom would do to their reputations. I added new location to the list.

I lay back on the bed and rubbed my eyes with my free hand and replaced the phone back in its cradle with the other.

I got changed and looked out of the window wearily, no sign of any stray Australian mammals, no Hitchcock style birds. At least my day was improving slightly. I glanced at the clock on my dresser, nearly five. I heard the back door shut. Amelia was home, and she seemed to be in one piece. "Hey Sook" she called as I emerged from my room and headed to the kitchen to meet her.

"Good night with Tray?" I asked grinning as she flushed.

"It was pretty great" she said her smile wide and open. "How goes wedding planning?"

"Don't ask" I replied I let out a breath and unloaded explaining to Amelia how the guest list was causing problems.

"Screw em, they're losing business" she said, ever the pragmatist. "Want me to hex em?" she asked, a little too enthusiastically.

"I think, telling a few of the local gossips, will be enough damage for the moment, you never know, if it starts to damage their business they might try to make things right"

"Oooh Miss Stackhouse, you have quite the business cunning, no wonder Eric loves you" I reddened slightly, she may have been jesting, but it was a fact that my ruthless streak appealed to Eric, and I had a worrying feeling that it was part of the reason he thought I'd make a good Vampire. "Speaking of tall blonde and dead" she continued "did he leave any uh… snacks?" I laughed, and pointed at the cardboard box on the table, there were two phallic cookies left, I watched her face as she picked one up examined it, "this isn't"- she began.

"to scale" I finished. "It's Eric, what do you think?" I smiled.

"That guys ego really knows no bounds does it?"

"Nope" I answered honestly.

"Well after seeing this I can't really blame him," she said and I nearly choked on my own cookie. Amelia, she was nothing if not accepting. We had a pot of hot tea, and Amelia dunked her cookie in the tea. I was helpless, tears of laughter running down my face.

"What?" Amelia asked probably wondering if I'd gone mad.

"Just imagining Eric's face, if he saw what you were doing" She looked down at her tea and joined me in laughter. The early evening passed in a blur of laughter, we talked about everything, Amelia even talked about how concerned she was about her and Tray not being able to have little Were's together (I swear it was like all the women in town had gone baby crazy lately).

An hour after dark Eric arrived, with Pam in toe.

ERIC

My lovers home was a matter of miles away when Pam began her argument all over again, considering that she was supposed to be obedient, I had yet to encounter a day she hadn't tried to "wind me up" as Amelia would say.

"Sookie should know"

"Why must we worry her" I repeated, I knew I had to give her a more valid reason to listen to me than "Because I said so" like all children she wanted me to give her an explanation when I didn't have all the answers, and like all young ones she consistently tried to rally against my authority. It was difficult for me to accept the new way of thinking that humans employed with their children, they tell them everything because they do not wish to limit their curiosity. When I was young we were treated as children until we were of age, which was admittedly young compared to modern standards, but it was a more difficult time, life spans were greatly reduced. As children we were taught that our mother and father's word was absolute, and not to be questioned. I put my foot down harder on the accelerator, taking my frustration out on the car. I felt for Sookie through the bond, she was quite content, and something had amused her greatly.

"Would you rather she was ill prepared" replied clearly irritated by my unwillingness to see her viewpoint.

"I just want her to have some peace, just for a while" I answered it had been hard for Sookie to relax until recently, it was a rare chaos free lull and I needed her to enjoy it.

"She'll have eternal peace if you don't tell her and she gets killed" Pam shot back.

"If anything changes, I'll be the first target, not Sookie, naturally as my child you would be second, and Sookie will have had enough warning to lie low".

"I hope for your sake and hers that you are right".

"So do I" I said as we followed the long driveway to Sookie's family home. I was glad that I'd paid to have this driveway evened out, my car didn't enjoy the dirt from the old track that had been here previously.

Sookie was at the door before we had even finished parking. That was the handy thing about the bond she always knew when I was close. I sighed and smiled, she was an unusual woman, she knew that my position as Sherriff would put her in danger, something she swore she would avoid, yet when I asked her if she thought I should quit, she said she trusted me, she didn't want me to resign because I enjoyed being sheriff. My being a vampire doesn't phase her, and she's beautiful as well, she has no idea how long I have searched for a woman to be my life partner. I grinned wider, imagining her face when I asked her. Time would tell if I was right.

I raced towards her scooping her up and holding her, sniffing her hair, and everywhere else.

"Enjoying the cookies lover?" I asked eyes bright and amused.

"Oh yeah," then she shot me a mischievous grin "Amelia did too".

"You know I can't become embarrassed Sookie" I replied, wondering if the cookies perhaps gave the witch more idea as to why Sookie stayed with "the dead guy" as she called me on occasion, when she thought I was out of ear shot.

"I know you can't even blush" another smile "but I'm working on it".

Sookie did not elaborate on her plan, and I got the distinct impression, Pam was helping her, with whatever it was she was working on.

Pam joined me at the door, we had open invitations but it was only polite to wait until Sookie waved us in. Pam sniffed out the baking and followed the trail to Amelia, she called out as she went "Eric has something to tell you".

Damn that child of mine, I thought as I saw worry and confusion flash across Sookie's face.

"It's nothing serious, just.." I paused not knowing how to phrase it so that she didn't become too alarmed. "There has been talk, that Victor would like very much, to have my title". I realised too late that this was not in any way reassuring.

"So you came to tell me that it's just talk? I know I'm blonde with big boobs but I'm not dumb". I took a moment to glance at her "big boobs" enjoying the sight more than I should given the circumstances.

"We have investigated the rumours and everything we have seen and heard, would corroborate the rumour". It was the best I could do.

"You're worried for me" she said stating a fact. That was the snag with the blood bond, gave you away at the worst possible times.

"Victor has expressed his interest in you, to a few people" I said noticing the rise in her heartbeat's tempo.

"So what are our options" she said, face set in a determined line.

"As of yet, we wait, there are safe guards in place, since the take over, I have been as you would say "a touch paranoid" you my love, will plan that wedding and enjoy it, and I shall be proud to dance with you all night and make you forget all about our troubles".

"That does sound like a great plan, but maybe there's a way…" she trailed off and then seemed to have another though. "Oh the caterer and location cancelled, so I was thinking we could have the wedding out back, all done up like a fairytale wonderland thing, I think that would appeal to Holly's wiccan side, and I was wondering if you knew anyone who might cater".

I told her I would get back to her on that. I was about to ask why she didn't try Extremely (elegant) Events, but thought of the Tiger and knew why she wouldn't want to go there.

The evening passed pleasantly enough, Pam was heading to Merlottes to meet her shifter, (I can't say I really understand her interest but that's women for you, always unpredictable) she took Amelia with her so we could have some alone time, that was why I'd made Pam, she was smart and loyal.

Sookie and I had an excellent night together, and there was nothing predictable about that at all…

SOOKIE

I woke as the first rays of light hit my window, Eric by now was in his custom hidey hole, complete with broad sword, just in case.

The evening before he'd thrown me for a loop, but now I had a plan, I would deal with the Victor Madden problem myself, well, with a little help from some supes who owed me favours. I looked at my schedule again. 1, do laundry. 2, sort music and stripper for bachelorette party. 3, talk to my cousin. 4, talk to Alcide. 5, get Holly to ok the garden wedding plan. 6, plan a coup.

All in a day's work for Sookie Stackhouse, Telepath, waitress, Vampire lover and problem solver.

_(Hope you liked this chapter, more on the way, but today I'm gardening so it might be Tuesday night/weds morning by the time chapter 4 is up. The next chapter is the bachelorette party) Thanks again for the reviews and such, if there's anything you really want to see let me know. – Sam x_


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